Director Phil Traill makes his feature film debut after success helming television sitcoms and award-winning short films.

Ditzy crossword puzzle designer Mary (Bullock) falls for handsome cable news cameraman Steve (Cooper) after just one short blind date. Although he is trying to politely give her the brush-off, she takes literally the comment that he wishes she could be with him on the road. She becomes infatuated with everything Steve-related and constructs a crossword with the same title as the movie. The clues are very personal and her editor at the Sacramento paper (Kansas City native Holmes Osborne) finds it so unprofessional that he fires her.

After a long bubble bath, Mary decides to pursue Steve as he travels across the United States covering breaking news stories. Mary is a freakishly intelligent, non-stop motor mouth full of useless trivia. She looks undesirable with an unbecoming shade of blonde hair that hangs limply on her head. She is always wearing long red boots.

Steve is afraid of her, labeling her as both a “crazy female stalker” and a “talking encyclopedia.”

Self-serving news reporter Hartman Hughes (Thomas Haden Church from “Sideways”), in an effort to play a prank on his cameraman, encourages Mary’s advances and gives her false hope that she can ultimately snare Steve.

A gullible and socially inexperienced Mary, whose watchword is perseverance, continues the chase. Mary makes friends with a couple of oddballs and ends up making news when she falls through a hole into an abandoned mine.

The weak script by Kim Barker (“License to Wed”) does the actors no favors. This is an embarrassing performance by Bullock who also serves as the narrator. There is not one single likable character in the movie. The movie desperately needs a laugh track since all the jokes and physical gags fail to even elicit a chuckle.

Although the running time is only 98 minutes, it seems like this drags on for an eternity.

After being pushed back from a March release date as counter-programming to “Watchmen,” it is puzzling why this cinematic disaster didn’t go straight to DVD.

The movie is trying to show the power of words and that there is no such thing as a “normal” person.

It should garner a boatload of nominations for Razzie Awards that are given to the worst movies of the year.

Review By:
Keith Cohen "The Movie Guy"